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Achieve Balance with the Doing Mind vs. Being Mind DBT Skill

In our fast-paced world, finding a balance between productivity and simply being can be a challenge. Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) addresses this balance through a skill known as “Doing Mind vs. Being Mind.” This mindfulness practice is essential for finding harmony between goal-oriented tasks and the enjoyment of the present moment. 

While both “Doing Mind” and “Being Mind” serve important roles, it’s when they are out of balance that we may run into difficulties. Let’s explore this DBT skill in-depth and learn how to apply it to enhance everyday life.

What Is the Doing Mind vs. Being Mind DBT Skill?

In DBT, mindfulness is a core component of emotional regulation and self-awareness. One particularly important aspect of mindfulness is learning to balance the Doing Mind and Being Mind. These two states of mind, while seemingly opposite, are both essential for living a fulfilled life. Each serves a purpose, but in their extremes, they can prevent us from using skillful means to navigate life’s challenges.

Understanding Doing Mind

The “Doing Mind” is exactly what it sounds like a state of mind that focuses on getting things done. It’s the driven, goal-oriented mindset that allows us to plan, evaluate, and act with ambition. Think of Doing Mind as the part of you that writes a to-do list, meets deadlines, or works through a difficult project. It’s relentlessly task-focused, always seeking to climb to the top of whatever mountain stands before it.

Without Doing Mind, important goals would go unmet. We need this mindset to manage our day-to-day lives, to plan for the future, and to ensure we are living in alignment with our values. Whether it’s going to work, managing responsibilities at home, or even completing personal projects, Doing Mind helps keep us moving forward.

When Doing Mind Becomes Too Much

However, like many things, Doing Mind is best in moderation. When too much time is spent in Doing Mind, we may fall into the trap of “autopilot.” This happens when we operate so automatically that we lose touch with the present moment, constantly focusing on the next goal or task instead of enjoying what’s happening around us.

Those caught in excessive Doing Mind often become “workaholics” or “perfectionists.” These individuals, or “doing-aholics,” are always busy, constantly driven by a need to be productive. Their sense of self-worth may become tied to what they accomplish, and they may lose sight of the importance of simply being. In extreme cases, life becomes an endless cycle of checking off tasks, with no time left for reflection, relaxation, or enjoyment of life’s simple pleasures.

Moreover, society often reinforces this behavior, praising productivity and achievement. Compliments like “You’re such a hard worker!” or “Wow, you get so much done!” can further entrench individuals in Doing Mind, making it harder to step away from this mode.

The Consequences of Too Little Doing Mind

On the flip side, not enough Doing Mind can also be problematic. When deficits in Doing Mind occur, people may find themselves “zoning out,” neglecting important tasks or living in a state of lethargy. Without the drive to accomplish necessary tasks, they may find themselves struggling to meet their needs, leading to negative consequences in their personal and professional lives.

A person with too little Doing Mind might have the intention to do something important—like applying for a job or paying bills—but instead, they drift through their days without making progress toward their goals. In the absence of Doing Mind, it’s difficult to build a sense of accomplishment or purpose.

What Is the Being Mind?

On the other end of the spectrum is the “Being Mind.” Being Mind emphasizes experience over achievement. It focuses on moment-to-moment awareness and acceptance of what is, without the need to change, fix, or accomplish anything. In this state, you’re not thinking about the next task or evaluating your progress toward a goal—you’re simply present.

Being Mind is often described as a state of “beginner’s mind,” where you experience things as they are in this very moment, without judgment or attachment. It’s the mindset you might have when you’re lying in the grass on a warm sunny day, feeling the sun on your skin and watching the clouds drift by. In these moments, you’re not trying to get anywhere or achieve anything. You’re simply being.

The Benefits of Being Mind

When we spend time in Being Mind, we’re able to fully appreciate the present. Instead of rushing from task to task, we take a step back and savor each moment. This might be as simple as enjoying a conversation with a friend, tasting every bite of a delicious meal, or feeling gratitude for the beauty of nature.

Being Mind allows us to elongate moments and truly experience life. Without it, we might miss the subtle joys that come from simply existing in the present. Whether it’s sitting in meditation, lying on the beach, or watching the stars, Being Mind gives us the space to rest, reflect, and rejuvenate.

When Being Mind Goes Too Far

As with Doing Mind, Being Mind also has its drawbacks when taken to the extreme. While it’s wonderful to experience the present moment, there are times when tasks need to be accomplished. A person who spends too much time in Being Mind might neglect important responsibilities like paying bills, completing homework, or answering emails.

Too much Being Mind can feel indulgent, leading to a lack of structure or productivity. While sitting in meditation or reflecting on life’s beauty has its benefits, life also requires action. Without Doing Mind, practical needs can go unmet, leading to stress or chaos later on.

Achieving Balance: Wise Mind

The goal of DBT’s mindfulness practices, including the “Doing Mind vs. Being Mind” DBT Skill, is to find balance. This balance is referred to as “Wise Mind” in DBT, and it represents the synthesis of Doing Mind and Being Mind. In Wise Mind, we take the best of both worlds, engaging fully in the moment while still working toward meaningful goals.

Wise Mind allows you to pursue goals, but with the awareness and presence that Being Mind provides. You’re able to work toward something important without losing sight of the present moment. For instance, instead of rushing through a project to meet a deadline, you approach it with awareness, allowing yourself to experience the process while still working toward completion.

In Wise Mind, there’s no need to choose between Doing Mind or Being Mind. Instead, you allow both to coexist, using them skillfully depending on the situation. This is the “Middle Path,” where you engage in life with balance and flexibility, applying Doing Mind when tasks need to be accomplished and Being Mind when it’s time to savor the moment.

How to Practice Balancing Doing Mind vs. Being Mind

So how can you practice this essential DBT skill? Here are a few tips:

  1. Increase Awareness of Your Mindset: The first step is recognizing when you’re in Doing Mind or Being Mind. Ask yourself throughout the day: “Am I focused on achieving something, or am I simply experiencing this moment?”
  2. Pause for Presence: If you find yourself stuck in Doing Mind, try taking short breaks to shift into Being Mind. This could be as simple as taking a few deep breaths, noticing the sensations in your body, or looking out the window and appreciating the view.
  3. Set Time for Being Mind: Schedule time each day to practice Being Mind. This could be during meditation, a walk in nature, or even while eating a meal. Allow yourself to be fully present without thinking about what needs to be done next.
  4. Incorporate Wise Mind in Tasks: Practice using Wise Mind by bringing awareness into your Doing Mind activities. While working on a project, notice how you feel, what you see, and what thoughts arise. Engage fully in the process rather than just focusing on the outcome.

If you’re ready to find balance through the Doing Mind vs. Being Mind DBT skill, the Counseling Center Group is here to help. Contact us today to learn how you can bring more mindfulness into your daily life.

The “Doing Mind vs. Being Mind” DBT Skill is an essential mindfulness practice that helps us find balance in life. By recognizing the importance of both Doing and Being Mind, we can learn to live with greater awareness and fulfillment. Whether you’re climbing a mountain of tasks or lying in the grass on a sunny day, both states of mind have their place—and by finding balance between them, you can lead a more mindful, intentional life.

If you’d like guidance on how to better balance the “Doing Mind vs. Being Mind” DBT skill, reach out to the Counseling Center Group—we’re here to support you on your mindfulness journey.